self expression is the key to deep okayness

life can suck but you can still make cool things

When we express ourselves, we shout to the world, “This is who I am, this is what I have to say, this is what I can do!”

You and I like to believe we have a consistent sense of self, but it’s in constant flux. Our desires, opinions, wants and needs are always changing. When we’re unable to express ourselves, we lose our identity. We forget who we are, what we care about, and what we want to do on this mad little rock floating through the void!

“Everything is vague to a degree you do not realise till you have tried to make it precise.”

- Bertrand Russell

I’m a terrible thinker — forgetful, flippant, and love using a generality or two. It’s not until I’m forced to truly clarify what I think do I realise what I’m trying to say in the first place. You’ll never know who you are until you can pinpoint it — and that can only occur with continued exploration through self-expression.

But self-expression can only be achieved by YOU. Your uniqueness is a blessing and a curse. You can’t blindly follow other people’s paths by copying their ideals and opinions. Their destinations may bring them joy but could make you miserable.

It doesn’t help that everyone desperately wants you to follow their path! “Look at me, I’ve found the keys to happiness! Pay me $699 I’ll show you how to find it too!”, they shout in their TED talks, Twitter threads and Ebooks. You want to be rich, right? You want to be beloved by everyone! You want fame! Glory! Right?! RIGHT?!

It’s tempting to conform because expressing the real you is scary. Being somebody is else much easier. It offers a sense of safety — somebody else has already made it, you’re just following the blueprints.

But safe is boring…and you’re not boring.

I spent most of my life trying to be like other writers, leading me to create stuff that felt pastiche-y and empty. The blueprints I followed built me a house I hated. My confidence in my writing has doubled since I started to explore what I want to say rather than what will resonate. It’s messier, blurrier and harder to define — but it’s me.

Here’s the secret: nobody knows what they’re doing. They keep trying stuff until it works. Ignore the people who say that they have the answers. Life is formless. There is no universally correct way to exist. The faster you accept that, the faster you’ll find the right existence for you. Let your creativity guide the way.

If you don’t know where you’re going or who you want to be, maybe it’s time to express yourself and start exploring. Only you have the answers.

---